It was, on balance, good to be out of Otraxis. Sadly, Lars had invited a goblin along. The little monster had practically inhaled a half-raw joint of pork, almost started a fight with a dwarven footman and had taken the name of half the gods under the sun in vain, at the top of his voice. How horrible, Llewella mused, that the atmosphere of such a quaint little wayshrine Inn be spoiled by this stunted barbarian.

Her old friend sat arguing with the creature, both of them well into their cups.

“No, Garp. Not a chance. Elves build the best bows. The best. Bar none”, Lars slurred.

“Goblin bow better”, the smelly wretch replied, “bow short for the riding of horse. Strong for to shoot through bison skull. Made from beautiful horn for to carve and polish. Always you buy bow from goblin, not tree-things”.

Garpo had made this exact statement, word-for-word, each time Lars made a new point. his lack of imagination was astounding. Even worse, each time he said ‘tree-things’ his greasy eyes would flick to Llewella. Never mind that she was a half-elf and had lived in a stone house in Otraxis all her life; to the goblin she was a tree-witch. Fine, she thought, to her Garpo was little more than a half-tame cannibal.

“These goat-pebbles you spitting make me dizzy, Lars. I go outside for to pass water and breathe the wild air for a while”, grumbled Garpo.

“The wild air?”, Llewella sneered as the goblin left, none too sober herself.

“The goblins think it is wrong to trap air inside a building, ‘Wella. They prefer life outdoors, in the wind and rain and wild air” replied Lars. He was about to add that this made them a little like the elves, but bit his tongue – literally.

“Why Lars? Why a goblin. Otraxis is full of men, elves and dwarves, all hungry for work and you choose this little green man!”

“Yes, he smells, he eats raw pork and pretends that it’s people, then drinks horse milk that smells like piss, but by Enlil ‘Wella – you should see the little bastard fight!”

“I’m not sure I want to”, she replied, as string of guttural goblin curses exploded from the coutyard.